Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Post of the Seven Veils

I have been graciously tagged by The Good, the Bad and the Ugly to list seven weird things about myself. It was over a month ago so that I doubt she even remembers tagging me. But, like an elephant, I didn't forget. Last January I was similarly tagged to come up with seven interesting things about myself and then tag seven more to do the same.

Once again, I am severely tempted to go the easier route and make up 7 untruths about myself for reasons of interest. But since I have never lied or embellished anything on this blog before, I find telling falsehoods uncomfortable. I hope you bought that.

So anyway, here they come.

My first four items of personality involve food.

1. I do not like to eat eggs. Well, most eggs. I will eat an omelet on occasion since it is mostly cheese, ham and hash browns. I can also eat scrambled eggs only if they are hot and loaded with cheese, ham and hash browns.

2. I love to eat cake. I even have a whole set of rules about eating cake. My first ever post on this blog was about cake. You can read it if you are curious about cake, but you probably are not.

3. I love school cafeteria food. I know I am in the minority, but I just love to eat there. It's probably because most school cafeteria food can be classified as either, fried or sweet. And when they serve french toast sticks, it's both. Now that Sweet Pea and Number One Son are both in school, I have many opportunities to join them for lunch when I am not working. I can also lean over to one of them and ask, "I'll trade you my stewed tomatoes for your tri-tater-tot."

4. The last food related quirk about me is that I like to mix corn with my mashed potatoes. That may sound weird to some of you, but I know there are a lot of you out there that do the same thing. Don't be embarrassed. Go ahead and give the waitress something to talk about back in the kitchen of your favorite restaurant.

5. Over half way to the end. Hang in there. One thing I definitely do not like is foot massages. My feet are too ticklish for any touching. I also don't care for back rubs or any kind of massages much. If I'm tense, I'll lay down on the couch and watch "The Office".

6. Let's get back to something I like to do. There is a sport that I enjoy to watch on television every four years. It is played during the winter Olympics, and it is called curling. For those who know what curling is, I'm sure you're eyes are rolling back into your skull from boredom just thinking about it. For some reason heavy stones sliding across the ice and knocking into each other entertains me. It's also fun to cheer on the sweepers and maybe hope that one will slip. But, sadly, they never do. In the last winter Olympics, the USA team got the bronze medal. That team was from Bemidji, MN and we visited the team captain's pizza restaurant. It was odd seeing an Olympic athlete tossing pizza dough behind the window. I so wanted to see him wearing his Olympic medal while spreading pepperoni, but it must have been at the medal polisher shop that week.

7. For those who made it this far, your reward is soon approaching.
When I was around six or seven years old, my Mom would take me to the mall to shop. I would be bored out of my mind while she looked at bolts of fabric and sewing patterns. During these times my mind would wander and I would people watch. Everyone I watched seemed more interesting than me, so I thought up something to make myself more exciting. My idea was to walk around the mall with an odd limp. In my mind, I thought everyone who saw me would wonder, "How did he get that limp?", "I wonder what happened to that kid.", "That poor kid. I should buy him some ice cream."

As I think about it now, they were probably feeling sorry for my mother for having such a nerdy kid.

Well, if you made it to the end, congratulations, you don't have to read any more. Give yourself a pat on the back.

I'm not going to tag anyone because I always end up tagging the same people over and over. If you would like to share seven of your innermost secrets, then I tag you. Just let me know when you do, so I can limp over to your blog to read them.


Anonymous said...

School cafeteria food??? That is weird! ;)

Great list!

Daddy Forever said...

Your school must have served good food. I didn't hate school cafeteria food, but I didn' love it either.

Sue said...

I think you own the title of first dad commenting on my blog!

I do like cake and I even read your first post about cake. I feel that strongly about it too. Too bad I don't have a mix because now I want to BAKE one! I love chocolate cake with cream cheese frosting. Mmmmmm.

Can't really say the same for cafeteria food though.

Casdok said...

I think your limp scam (!) was very creative!!

delightful-d said...

Funny post LB!
My parents (yes, I know, they need to comment) think you are the best writer! They love all your posts!
You make them laugh!

DJ Kirkby said...

Lol, loved this. Chopper always wants the cake corners too, and homemade bread loaf ends. Mashed potatoes tast best with creamed corn which they do not sell over here! :( I'm with you on the massage bit, urk, hate that kind of prolonged contact. Still laughing about you faking a limp, what a kid!

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I'm a 40 year old dad of two. My wonderful wife, Lady Di, and I try to keep the kids from blowing things up here in central Minnesota.